


Strange Love. Love gazes & hate scarfs.

by Jynjy1999z



Category: Depeche Mode
Genre: 80's, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Hate, Lemon, Love, M/M, Sadness, Sex, Slash, bandfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-08
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:00:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 13,984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26897821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jynjy1999z/pseuds/Jynjy1999z
Summary: Alan feels the tension inside the band. Something is wrong... He must know what.
Relationships: Martin Gore/Alan Wilder
Comments: 8
Kudos: 9





	1. You...Him

Alan took a cigarette from his jacket pocket. Smoking was the only thing that calmed him down, things between the four of them hadn't been the best. There were times when maybe he didn't need them but as the years changed, the dependency grew. Alan, above all, depended on Martin. He needed his wild personality, his tender outlook on life, the innocence that sometimes gave him a placid sensation.

Martin was by far a person who caused a fickle addiction. Dave was the one who was emotionally dependent on him. Sometimes it seemed like a stormy obsession, but those comments caused him scorn and not anger. And Andy ... Well. Andy was the kind of guy who never seemed to agree with almost anyone. 

Sometimes Alan wondered how Martin could be friends with the rare specimen named Andrew. 

Martin had been a long time coming. Although it was not his responsibility to worry about the blond, it was something he had developed with insight. The dim light from the lantern made him uncomfortable. The smoke coming out of his mouth made him desperate. Dave was an obvious bad influence but there was nothing he could do about it, this was not a game of jealousy and dating. They were just strangers who had to support each other. Fletch did not possess the patience that Wilder displayed whenever the author was out of sight. The redhead had gone to sleep hours ago. Alan tried equally but he didn't conceive the dream, not knowing that his Martin was God knows where with God knows who ...

Your Martin? 

"He will never be mine" he corrected himself smiling. Anyone who saw him would say that he had already lost his sanity from talking to himself. The lights of the city looked like ghosts of light that wandered from one point to another dizzy the view of the musician. It had already been six hours since he had left his side, six hours in which he had not been able to enjoy his face, six hours without his intoxicating voice. 

Wilder sat in one of the armchairs, as if it were an abandoned throne. As if he were king of loneliness, sovereign of imprecision. How long would he not accept the fact that he had to be Martin's guardian shadow? In his mind he had transformed into a character in a bizarre timeless play. A pale personification. 

Where had all that energy gone? Where was Al? The boy who yearned with his heart to become what his mind had convinced him to be. A recognized musician, a figure that was seen wherever he went. 

Love and hate ... It would be the perfect name for a situation like that. Even he did not feel cold, something trembled inside him. Anxiety made him a slave to his memories with Martin.

For god's sake! When did he start to feel this way? At what point was Martin's obsession controlling him? "No, no. It's not an obsession, it's not. It's ... Passion?" He whispered unsure placing the cigarette inside the ashtray.

It must be passion. He knew of no other emotion that would get him to the point where he was. He had felt fragile with Martin even though the blond could look more fragile. It was like a glass in Gore's hands, a glass figurine that danced to the beat of the songwriter's voice. The door to the compound opened with the image of Dave passing through. The black-haired man yawned, rubbing his eyes. 

"Ally! What are you doing up?" The singer asked with a half smile

"I was worried, for both of you" the keyboardist anticipated when in doubt

"Awww. How nice but you lost hours of your sleep for nothing. Martin is at the reception" the youngest took off the jacket he was wearing, throwing it on one of the armchairs

"In the reception?" 

"He's calling his girlfriend" the singer whispered with an amused frown.

"I see" muttered the chestnut

"I don't see why. Jo knows I'm fine." 

"I guess Martin has a close bond with his girl." 

"Yeah, well. I'll go to sleep, tomorrow I have an interview first thing in the morning and I don't want to look tired"

"If you arrive at this time I doubt very much that you will be able to see yourself healthy tomorrow. You will have to ask Mart for help" Alan laughed playing with his hands

Dave smiled, leaving under a halo of humor. One of the characteristics of the singer. Gore was the next to walk through the door with a less friendly expression.

"Mart? Are you okay?" Asked unsure the older standing

"Jaded is the word that defines me" sighed the composer fed up 

"What happened? Did Dave give you trouble?"

"Dave is the problem" Martin tossed his long boots into a corner 

"Really? What has he done now?" 

"You already know him. He sees a woman and he can't control himself" 

"Does that bother you? I thought you weren't interested in what Dave did with his life." 

"The truth is I care to what extent we are injured by the situation. Time ago, I was not interested in journalists but now I feel that they are like executors"

Alan could barely breathe a sigh "If you feel bad about that ... I think you should stop going out with Dave" 

"Leave him alone? You're crazy" the blond complained, leaving the room 

"I didn't say leave him alone. What if I went out with him? Or Andy?" 

Martin laughed as he took off the shirt he was wearing. "Can you imagine? Andy is going to kill Dave."

Wilder snorted in anguish at the portal of the door "You can't keep up with him, no more. You are interested in other things."

"Other things? Al, just leave it there. I don't think you can handle Dave anyway." 

"Let me try" asked the chestnut, sitting on Gore's bed.

"Would you really do it?" Alan frowned. Wasn't it obvious that he would do anything for him? Martin was blind in the shape of his songs, maybe the fantasy of the world had made him distracted. 

"I would do anything for you" exclaimed the keyboardist. Had something changed by saying it? Would Martin be impressed by that phrase? 

The blond smiled getting into bed with a tender expression "I know I just wanted to know if you are ready to withstand Hurricane Dave"

"I heard you" exclaimed Gahan coming out of the bathroom

"Nothing isn't true" replied the composer taking the sheets.  
Dave just raised a despotic palm shutting himself in his room. 

"I owe you one, then" Mart snuggled to the mattress looking at the other with his eyes. Alan for his part felt foolish at the guitarist's expectant gaze. 

"Are not you sleepy?" Asked the blond stroking Wilder's arm 

"Yes, I'm sorry. Sometimes I forgot ... that I have to go to sleep."

"I understand you. All this worries you too, right?" 

"Part. Part I want you to feel good." Martin didn't know why but Alan looked more anxious than when they were just starting out. Alan had an intrigue that would not let him rest.


	2. Way Out

The next morning Alan was exhausted. He had managed to sleep only a few hours. The other hours ... The torturous experience of feeling a weight on the heart overwhelmed him.

Martin looked splendid even when he had slept just a few hours anyway. How could it still look pretty? What was the secret of that singular freshness? The keyboardist could barely keep his attention focused on some focus. 

Dave was chatting about how wonderful his night had been, how every time he did it. Andy just read the newspaper while he was having his morning coffee. Martin was nodding as if he hadn't been there with a smile ... Martin always smiled. In his unconscious Wilder prayed that this breath-taking gesture would never be erased. 

"What's wrong?" Andy asked trying to stop Gahan's verbiage by lowering the newspaper to the keyboardist

"I was very worried about Mart, I stayed up all night and when he finally arrived I couldn't get to sleep" he explained in a downcast tone 

"You don't trust me?" Dave questioned taking a sip of coffee

"It's not about trust, it's about companionship"

"Alan, just get to the point" asked the uncomfortable blond 

"Get to the point?" The redhead questioned crossing his arms 

"I think Martin should rest more. I know you like him to go with you everywhere but I want him to rest well. Have a full night's sleep" Wilder knew it would cause a feeling of apathy in Gahan but nothing that would not happen in a few days

"Yes, I guess that's fine" the black-haired man explained with an annoying movement of his lips. 

"It doesn't really matter, it's a suggestion ..."

"But he's right. You've been out a lot in these months. You must feel exhausted" Fletch interrupted somewhat anxiously 

"I'm fine" and as if it were a shield, the composer smiled at his friend again 

"If you feel bad just say it, I don't want to force you to do anything you don't want to do" Dave looked concerned to hear the new problems 

"It's not about feeling bad, it's about thinking about the other" 

"It's hard to understand ... Especially Mart. Have you seen him? He looks great all the time everywhere" Dave felt some envy at some point but soon forgot about it. 

"What do you want to do about it then?" Fletch asked uncomfortably Alan sighed heavily assuring that what he would say would not please either of them.

"I want you, Andy, to be with Dave just a little bit more and I want you, Dave, to be a little less intense." 

"What?" They both asked at the same time

"Me being Dave's babysitter?" Andy frowned, obviously angry

"Babysitter? Oh come on, Fletch. You can barely take care of yourself" Gahan spat reluctantly 

"Hey, this is not about you and your egos, this is about Martin's health" Alan sighed bringing his fingers up to his hair. 

"I will not go out at night with him. I can negotiate going to interviews, maybe even traveling with him but I will not go into a club or a bar with him" 

"Why are you always despotic to me?" Asked the black-haired confused 

"Because you cause me dramas wherever I go with you" 

"Andy, don't behave like that. Please" begged the blond taking the glass of water in front of him 

"What? I'm telling the truth. Did you forget Germany in 86?"

"No, I don't remember" the singer whispered disinterestedly 

"Obviously, you forget everything that hurts you. You don't remember what you do to others." 

"Guys ..." the composer murmured, rubbing his eyes wearily.

"Andy, if you can't handle this, it's fine, no one is forcing you, you will go to the interviews with Dave and I will go out with him at night" Alan tried to calm the urge but the atmosphere was tense 

"I'm sick of this bureaucracy. When do we vote for Dave to be the ruler of our lives?"

"When he became the most important thing in the band?" Said Martin taking an aspirin from his pocket 

"Will you get on his side too? ... Damn ..." Andy sighed getting up from the table. 

"I'm sorry that hurts but Dave in theory is the most necessary here. Don't be offended" the blond muttered placing one of his hands on Alan's leg

"No, no. You're right, without him ... This isn't Depeche Mode, right?" Even that had made him angry Wilder hid his emotions under a calm, almost submissive air. 

"If you didn't like me from the start you should had told Vince" Dave said it in such a frivolous way that it gave Wilder chills

"Vince? Do you want to talk about Vince now? ... You know what? Fuck off" the redhead pointed at him angrily 

"Andy" asked Gore stunned but his friend ignored him 

"And you instead of playing the perfect marriage should pay attention to what is necessary. Do one of you know that Dan has been calling all the bloody morning? Of course not. I take care of those things and now you ask me to spend time with this ... Egocentric that all he does is look in the mirror in love with his reflection "

"This is called self-love" Gahan assured venously taking a cookie to his mouth 

"Do what you want, I'm leaving" Andy finished by leaving for the door

"Andrew, please" asked the blond but Fletch had already left. His instinct forced to follow him 

"Mart, let him go, he'll be back anyway" Dave assured taking a toast 

"Dave is right, just this once" stated the chestnut 

Martin gave both of them an annoyed look to go after Fletch in silence. 

"Great ..." ironic muttered the black-haired man 

"I will go with you to your interview, don't feel bad. Fletch has been sensible lately, more sensible than Martin" Alan straightened sure that the whole mess would have an end 

"Are you not mad at me?" 

"No, I'm not going to judge you for your decisions" Dave thought Alan was extremely sincere, but in this case it was as if he didn't care at all. All Wilder cared about was Martin.


	3. What?

Dave could be extremely unsure of himself when he put his mind to it. A stutter or a repeated question, a continuous phrase or an unnecessary gesture. Alan struggled with the daily migraines caused by having to put up with everyone's inaccurate behavior. Only Martin seemed right, as if he knew that trying to break free was complex.

Martin had exposed himself enough for years of rumors, he had plenty of rumors, and he had enough with the ones he had. At the end of the interview, Alan was waiting impatiently, his foot tapping the sidewalk. Dave sometimes took his time.

He didn't like to admit it, it sometimes made him mad, but for the very fact of loving him so much he never dared to tell him. Somehow Gahan had earned a place in his heart, a big piece. Not that he was going to dislike Andy, only that Dave seemed to be much more lacking in affection than Fletch.

Andrew seemed to be sensible or withdrawn but on the contrary, the redhead was a beast with an angry character. The only thing that seemed to be self-conscious were their smiles. Finally the black-haired man deigned to leave with a lively gesture

"Finished?" Alan asked stroking his own neck 

"Yes. Isn't it obvious?" The singer was surprised to answer 

"Okay, let me get a taxi and we can go to ..." 

"Actually, just maybe ... I don't want to go back, I mean I don't want to go back immediately" the singer started walking down the street without apparent worries.

"You know Dan will get mad without mentioning ..." 

"Martin? You have it on the tip of your tongue these days" the youngest interrupted again in a touchy tone. Wilder didn't quite understand Dave's haughty attitude but decided to follow him, the last thing he needed was to lose him. Among the sea of people in the street, finding the black-haired man was a task of patience, but there was the perfect specimen of a curious strolling through streets illuminated by the light of a pale sun. 

"So this is what we're going to do today? Run away from our responsibilities?" Questioned the chestnut to which the singer laughed taking a shortcut 

"Don't worry, you'll be back in time to see your beloved Marty" Had it been irony? 

"Dave, Dave Dave! Stop, by God sake. What are you doing? Stop attacking me, I'm not the enemy" the keyboardist stopped him, taking him by the arm

The younger man sighed like a jaded child as he released himself from Wilder's grasp. 

"Why you don't trust me?" 

"Who said I don't trust you? You don't need to drag me all over town to know that I trust you. Where are you taking me anyway?" The black-haired man showed him the place without words only with his palm. 

"A coffee shop? Will you die to tell me beforehand?" Wilder gasped placing both hands on his waist 

"I need to clear up, smoke a while and ... Think" that face was not lying, a strange shadow of fatigue was drawn on Dave's face and although he was well known for being flirtatious, now his attractiveness was overshadowed by sadness, a gray halo around his smile.

"You don't need to do this with me, you know that you are my friend, just by saying it I would have said yes" 

"I can't risk these days" with a cigarette in hand the singer entered the cafeteria that did not look extravagant, only large. 

"You can't risk? What does that mean?" The black-haired man did not answer, he looked for the smoking area, sitting down with regret. 

"Sounds bad but I can't trust Martin. He's Fletch's best friend."

"Wow, moment. Is this about Andy?" The musician was surprised as he sat down 

"No, it's not because of him. It's because in these months things got out of hand, situations got out of control" 

"If you don't tell me what it is about, I won't be able to know" Dave blew out a puff of smoke illuminated by the light from the window that reflected the morning sun 

"I want to apologize to Fletch but I don't know how." Had Dave blushed? 

"And the apologies are on the grounds of? ..." Dave played with the cigarette in his mouth uncomfortably, obviously blushing 

"Please Dave. I know your darkest secrets. One more to collection." 

"I screwed up, bad this time"

"Oh my gosh. What have you done to Fletch? Steal a dollar from him? Throw his glasses out the window? Ruin his favorite shirt?" 

"Stop listing the things I've done to him in this life" Alan laughed looking at the recommendation letter. 

"Tell me now or I'll go" 

"Do you remember France?" The black-haired man flattened his cigarette against the ashtray 

"Wow yes, I adored it" said Alan looking at the singer's face "Why?" 

"I don't know how to say this so I'll just say it" 

"Say it" Alan yawned with a hand on his face

"I tried ... to kiss him one night and things got murky between the two of us." Wilder lost his breath for a few seconds. What the hell did he just hear? 

"That you try to do what!?" At the least opportune moment the waiter appeared with a friendly gesture 

"Good morning gentlemen, what are you going to serve?" 

"Coffee, two medium cups" Wilder suddenly exclaimed taking the situation seriously 

"Very good, excellent choice"

Dave looked at one of his many rings, turning it around with his index finger, acting like a child in penance. "I didn't want to do it" 

"You didn't want to kiss him or you didn't want him to be mad at you?" 

Gahan frowned "A bit of both actually"

"Dave!" The chestnut scolded severely 

"Okay, I didn't want to do it, I was drunk and he must have taken that into account. You know how I am when I'm drunk." 

"Lewd?" 

"It was an accident. Since then he has been quite cold to me." 

"Why doesn't Mart know about this?" 

"Andy didn't tell him so he wouldn't get mad at me. You know what Andy thinks about burdening Mart with other people's problems." 

"At some point and I hate to say it, he's right. Martin can't be thinking about how to solve other people's dramas" mused the keyboardist, clenching a fist 

"I don't know what to tell him, he's so ..."

"Grim" used the chestnut but Dave kept thinking 

"Insensitive" 

"Well, if you came all drunk to kiss me I don't know how patient I would be" 

"If it were Martin you wouldn't say anything" 

"That is not true" 

"Of course" 

"No!" 

"Yes! No way! I'm sorry to tell you Alan but that you like Martin it shows a lot" Wilder pursed his mouth, blinking continuously

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Give me your opinion pleeease :(


	4. Sounds like the plan

Alan honestly felt each bone three times as heavy. It is as if his body reacts in a bad way.  
The last year was turbid.  
Finally Dave decided to face the reality of his nonsense

"I'm just saying I'm sorry and that's it?" Dave asked walking next to Alan

"Is that difficult? I'm sorry, I even think that if you don't force it, it'll sound sincere."

"You are so mean to me, I'm really sorry"

"You are a lustful elf. What did you expect?"

"Hey! Nobody says anything about your affection for Martin"

"The Martin thing is something different, it is about something more than drunkenness" remarked the chestnut a little sad

"You fell in love?" Gahan laughed indiscreetly

"No ... Mart is somehow special to me. I love him and respect him, not the sad case of Fletch"

"Oh please Andy wants it for him. Sometimes he's so ... provocative" explained the black-haired

"Does he seem provocative to you? God! Have mercy on the boys with glasses" scoffed Wilder crossing the sidewalk

"He did it to you too, that romp"

"I don't remember Fletch playing with me."

"Look, let's leave this until here. There is no point in making you understand and you never would. Your instinct to protect them will never let you be on my side."

Wilder stopped crossing his arms

"Haven't I protected you too? Excuse me but many times I had to cover your disasters. As you can see, I'm here with you, not there with Martin or Andy. You know I'm your best friend, I don't understand why you suddenly get like this. . I thought that everything between the two was fine."

Dave sighed stroking his wrist

"It is, I don't have and I don't want problems with you" the black-haired man somehow looked distressed but Alan didn't want to pressure him.

"Let's go back, do you want to? You must be exhausted" assured Alan placing one of his hands on the singer's shoulder in a friendly way

"Ok but don't be mad"

Alan smiled patting his friend's back  
//////

When they returned, things looked the same as when they left.  
Alan believed that Mart had gone after his friend and had not returned yet, what was his surprise to see the blonde leave his room.

"You already came back. I was worried because you didn't come back after the interview" smiled, sighing heavily the composer

"It was my fault, I took Alan for a walk around" Dave assured something tense

"Yes, well. I wanted to go with him" Alan blamed himself trying to make the singer feel better

"Okay, I know sometimes it's good to go outside for some fresh air."

Martin always understood, it was what he most needed, it was what he most needed to polish, understanding.

"If you don't mind I'll go take a nap, I'm still tired from the other night"

"It's okay. I have some things to do yet" Wilder declared anxiously as he met Martin's eyes above him.

"Go, get your strength back" with a tender movement the blond stroked Gahan's shoulder who left under a veil of ... Sadness?

Wilder couldn't discern through Dave's tangle of mixed feelings. It was a real puzzle without resolution

"Hard day, huh?" The blond exclaimed studying Alan's face

The chestnut sighed acting a false boredom

"I can't say no, you already know me. If Dave wants to go somewhere I have to go with him"

"Thanks, I can handle Andy but Dave ... Well, he always gets away with it" Martin smiled leaning against the wall

"He will always be the ruffian in the band" the keyboardist whispered in a low voice, placing his hands inside the pockets of his jacket.

"Are you really tired?" The minor asked in surprise, causing Wilder to think about the answer several times.

What? Would they share time like in Germany? In those warm spring days that he managed to touch the senses of the blond and that for fear of being discovered he stopped?  
The composer's diamond eyes looked even more beautiful in the semi-darkness of the room than in the light.

Yes, Martin was a dark deity, a cruel and sensual demi-god.  
It was a rare mix of innocence and perversion.  
He was a pervert, Yeah ... Looking at him that way, Wilder thought he could read his expressions. Somehow he didn't understand at all how Martin's arousal worked.  
A sigh, an anxiety and an hour, was all that Gore needed to find passion in things that seemed unknown.

"No, I wanted to make sure Dave went to bed."

"Then come to mine" in an almost invisible tone proclaimed the blond

Was it hot or was Wilder's senses failing? He could have sworn he started sweating

"Where is Fletch?" Curious asked the chestnut simulating tranquility

"Unlike Dave, Fletch, finds calm in solitude. I sent him for some things, there is a store not far from here"

"I guess it won't take long" the keyboard player hesitated, taking a deep breath.

"Do you want me to take it long?" The minor inquired with a deep tone

"Why would you want to ...? No, don't delay him, I'll be calmer if he comes back"

"Believe it or not those two love each other, there are some things they have done for each other. The only one who knows those little things is me but sometimes I feel tired to tell both of them how stupid they are fighting. They are friends, in a strange way "

"I'm not sure they're friends, they act like two squirrels fighting over nuts"

Martin broke into an explosive laugh that he uselessly covered with his hand

Wilder barely drew his expression lines

"Do you think I'm cruel?" Martin gasped, disappointed in himself.

"You do well, if someone really loves you you must find out for yourself"

"You love me?"

The question itself annihilated Wilder's common sense  
Martin wanted to play, that was for sure.

"Ok, you already had your five minutes of 'let's hunt Alan' now tell me what you want. I can give you everything you can think of" exclaimed the chesnut between afflictions, Martin smiled evilly while practicing his famous look, the look that ordered you to take off your clothes just by understanding  
"God ..." the keyboardist muttered "Is this what you want?" Wilder questioned in an automatic purr, taking the composer's arm roughly to push him against his body.

"I forgot what it felt like," said the remarkably happy blond between gossip.

"The reason we stopped playing hard was because you had bruises on your body"

Gore shivered feeling the chestnut's heavy breathing in his ear as the keyboardist's mouth searched the smooth skin of his neck.

"It doesn't matter, a bruise it's just a closed wound, they won't kill me" moaned the blond, caressing Wilder's arm who held his waist in a tight hug

Martin believed that attraction did not distinguish in gender, that sex and love did not stop to see the names of those who professed it. Borrowing certain foreign senses that had been instilled in him was not considered a sin, just being a knower of other people's senses.


	5. The senses

Alan opened the door with an unoccupied hand as he struggled to please the blonde as much as he wanted.

A few subtle bites to the entire neck made the composer a sea of gasps. When it came the time to close the door Wilder was clever to find the lock.

"What time did you become a contortionist?" The composer laughed jokingly as Alan released him.

"With you I have to learn quickly, I can't hesitate for a second"

"You lie, I have given you time and enough" smiled the blonde sitting on the bed

"I don't mean that kind of time, you're always busy, we can't have privacy" Alan agreed, taking off his jacket briskly

"Neither of us have time, you have to run back and forth with Dave"

"Enough of talking. What it really matters is we are here, you and me" sighed the keyboardist phlegmatically taking a place next to the youngest

The composer smiled maliciously, gently kissing the keyboard player's lips.

Wilder did not listen to his thoughts, instead he preferred to let himself be carried away by his wild senses although of course it was first of all to fulfill Martin's whims

Alan took matters into his own hands by grabbing both of Gore's shoulders, jerking him to the mattress.

"Will you be obedient, Marty?" He asked in a harsh tone making the younger vibrate

"I will if you please me" he argued writhing on top of the sheets

An unexpected rough grip on both of his wrists made him groan

"If you say something that I don't like again, I swear that I will leave a mark on every inch of this silky skin" promised the keyboardist.

"Ok, we agreed to play dirty but that's already sick Alan, lower the intensity" laughed the blond under a disappointed look

"I hadn't seen it that way"

"It doesn't matter, change the sentence and everything will stay the same"

Alan sighed with no ideas, it had been enough of the last time

"Do you want tea? Well, you'll have to put the tea bag in your mouth first."

Martin laughed jocularly, almost pulling Alan off of him.

"What the hell does that mean? For God's sake" the youngest cried closing his eyelids.

"The repertoire is a bit rusty" smiled the Londoner embarrassed

"I guess it will be normal this time" with a sure movement Martin moved from his place staying next to the chestnut who blushed as he beat his hair with his hands

"I'm sorry, is just ..."

"Don't apologize, I know you have a lot of responsibilities now, stress doesn't help much when it comes to passion"

Martin knew the many ways to comfort everyone in the band, a simple caress to the keyboard player's cheek was enough for a lasting comfort for weeks.

"At least I can still kiss you" Alan smiled as his thumb traveled on the blonde's lower lip.

His lips were undoubtedly an aphrodisiac from which he could not disagree.

"You can do more than just kiss me" the musician whispered ardently, stroking the zipper of the annoying leather pants

Wilder let those deft fingers lower the buckle on it, interrupting his masculinity. Gore managed to taste the pinkish lips of the keyboardist who had honestly already lost the common notion as his manhood rose little by little with each rise and fall of the other's slim hand.

If it was time to sin then ... So be it. After short minutes, the blonde dedicated himself to lowering his pants a few inches while constantly pumping Wilder's member. The situation warranted some hidden gasps under a constant gruff moan, just enough not to wake Dave.

Mart knew how to be diabolical and this time he showed it when he lowered his glorious lips to the tip of the chestnut's sex, which caused a spasm between pain and pleasure for the keyboardist. He didn't dare look him in the eye as he took care of the situation, barely muttering random words as he felt a mixture of moisture and pressure on his phallus.

The worldly glory, the lawless pleasure, the life of 'sin' he had heard as a teenager now became real under fellatio that seemed eternal 

None of that mattered anymore when feeling on the verge of orgasm with the skillful lips of the composer

Martin stopped making Alan curse the fact. "I want you to give it to me ... all over my face"

"You want it?" The chestnut asked furiously taking his own member in a fast rhythm

"I want it so much" Martin gasped, watching Al's hand follow its own rhythm.

"Beg me"

Mart smiled lewdly removing Alan's hand as he brought all the hardness to his mouth working it slowly

The chestnut could barely hold his breath, his belly tightening with every swallowed inch

Gore delicately kissed each side of the member, pleased to hear the groans of the keyboardist who in temptation stroked the composer's hair

"Give it to me, please. I want it so much" he sighed sucking gently

"Damn" Alan muttered looking at the younger man's demonic eyes as his hips forced him to move a little.

The door rattled under a slow knock

"Mart?" Asked a voice well known to both

"I'm here" replied the blond, standing up nervously

"Can I come in?" The redhead begged from the other side

"Shit" cursed under the chestnut

"What do I do?" Whispered the blonde wiping the corner of his lips

"You already told him you were here, bring him in" replied the keyboardist almost silently

"Bring him in with this?" Martin pointed at the keyboard player's erect member

"I've been in worse situations" muttered the chestnut, putting it inside his pants "Just don't let him go to the bathroom"

"God ... Give me a second Andy"

"Ok? ..." he replied with some surprise

Alan laughed a little sorry and half funny

"You can tell a lot ... you've been sucking a dick" he teased biting his tongue to avoid being discovered

"Shut up and go to the bathroom" Martin smiled pushing him

"You know that you are my little spoiled right?" Alan sighed kissing Martin's neck

"I know, I know. After I talk to Andy I want my cream" the blonde sobbed, squeezing the keyboard player's crotch.

Alan sighed painfully squirming a bit

"You'll be lucky if the nozzle of the cream doesn't break first" he gasped jokingly

They hadn't had fun like this for years and that teenage attitude somehow gave him back a sparkling feeling that they had forgotten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is shit but I'm doing what I can OK? I will delete it later


	6. Sins.

Alan sat on the toilet in Martin's personal bathroom, this erotic hide and seek was not his thing but they couldn't explain something like that to Fletch or at least not worry him about things ... banal.

Alan felt his member throb inside his underwear, he did not know at the moment if he felt pain or pleasure. He couldn't stand it long before he pulled down his pants a bit, letting his harshness escape.  
Martin was a vicious little one. Manage to take it to a vigorous point and then abandon it just at the peak of pleasure. A few taps of his glorious hand and he would have achieved the perfect ecstasy.

Sometimes fantasies are not fulfilled to the letter. He took a towel from the shelf surrounding the member that was taking on a red colour.

Fletch knew how to ruin his day, today had been no the exception.  
He could barely hold his breath and wanted to finish now.

"What's happening?" Martin asked nervously, Alan shook his head when he heard the blonde's insecurity

"Me? You mean what happens to you" the redhead's voice was furious.

"Look, if you're going to start crying because you don't want to go out with Dave, you can complain with Dan, I don't care if you don't like him, it's partly your responsibility"

"It's not about that, it's about you not reacting to anything"

"We agreed that we would be fair, egalitarian. If you put in a little effort, you would see how well you like it".

"Are you really gonna to throw me into the wolf's mouth?"

"Wolf? Dave is hardly a kitten, if he scratches you, you will compose yourself, besides ..."

"What do you want?"

"I want you to apologize to him"

"What?!"

Alan smiled with some painful spasms as he heard Mart torture his friend.

"Dave is like a child, he's not evil as you draw him in your mind"

"The least he has is innocence" snapped Andy

"Hell, it's true" the chestnut whispered thinking about everything that had happened so far.

"Well, I want you to be honest with me, tell me what thing stop you from being nice to him?"

"Are you really asking? I don't want to go out with him because I just don't want to."

"You lie and very badly" scrutinized the composer

"I don't have time to play your games, apparently none of the three understand what is this all about"

"What thing?"

"Work without upsetting our personal lives"

"I would love to hear how you hate the others but I have things to do, ok? Now go"

"I have to do it?"

"Go out Andy and go apologize to Dave"

Andy didn't say more and left under the sound of a hellish door slam. After a few seconds Martin knocked on the bathroom door.

"It's me" said the blonde in a whisper

"Who else?" Alan replied laughing, making the strength to reach the door key "Is not like Andy would come to wash his hands after arguing with you"

"Very funny ... What are you doing with a towel tied to your penis?" The composer asked crossing his arms

"It's not tied"

"Take it off, let's get this over" the blonde gasped tiredly

Alan put the towel on the floor with a sigh of pain.

"Are you closer to cum?" The youngest found out taking the member in his hand while kneeling in front of him

Wilder nodded wordlessly.

"Well, I want you to do something for me"

"Whatever you want" assured Alan feeling Martin's fingers again on his member

"Fuck my mouth"

Alan was surprised at the request and even frowned

"Years ago you told me you hated it"

"Years ago it was a long time ago, Alan. Besides when I feel depressed the only thing that makes me feel better is sex, you know it and if it's rough sex better. If I can please you ... at least I'll feel good about myself."

"It's not that I don't like the idea but it just surprises me. Are you sure you want to do it? We have a show tonight and if it makes you feel bad it will be my fault."

"Come on Alan, don't be a coward. Tell me ... Don't you want it? Don't you want to come in my mouth?" Asked innocent with those divine eyes that hypnotized the keyboard player while he was nibbling the glans

"You have no idea how much I want it" he sighed pulling his head back 

"Then show me, show me you want it, that you desire it"

"Can you handle this?"

"If I can with three german girls I can with an english guy" exclaimed the minor annoyed to which Wilder laughed

"Okay, but we will do it with my rule, if it makes you feel bad you take it out of your mouth"

"I never take things out of my mouth" challenged the blond from the ground as Wilder stood from the toilet

"Good. Don't worry, I'll make it soft this time" the chestnut whispered as he felt Mart's tongue run over his hardness again.  
Mart knew by heart the tricks to make Wilder's body react so he began to pay full attention to the glans while Alan cursed in incomprehensible gasps

Alan slowly took the shoulders of the blonde drawing it towards him with a leisurely rhythm, without haste. In some dark corner of his desires he longed to fuck that perfect mouth with fury but his reasonable part stopped him.  
Considering the show was his concern for now.

The blonde asked for more without any prayer, he only squeezed the keyboard player's butt, making him understand to increase the speed

Martin took it out of his mouth looking again at Wilder who barely breathed between moans and sighed every second

"Don't you want to do it to me ... Daddy?" Martin scrutinized Alan's dark memories very well and hit the nail on the head by reminding him of the meeting in Germany

Alan sighed exhausted, accepting the blonde's provocation.

"You win babe, this time it will be as you want"

Alan couldn't believe he would do this, he would put Martin's prayers ahead of his duty to the band. So much power did the composer have over him?

"You can do it by your own or you want help?" He asked looking at the blond who denied grabbing the chestnut's phallus between his lips "So be it"

Alan barely glanced out of the corner of his eyes at the cute orbs of the composer tracing the path to his throat carefully

With a smooth movement Wilder took his rhythm a little faster, holding with both hands on the bathroom wall, cold as ice, he did not care.  
He was only interested in making the movement of his hips the right one for Martin. The blonde promptly began to hold the member from the base as it delicately traveled down his throat.

Alan's memories worked in a strange way, the first flirtation with Martin was not the correct for the moment but there he was making him see that from the beginning Gore was a little beast hungry for physical pleasure.

He began to feel the electricity of his muscles traveling up his thighs, his belly contracting more and more. Pleasure ran through every inch of his nerve endings until in a single guttural moan and with a few rude movements he ejaculated in Martin's mouth or rather in his throat since that is where the tip of his member was.

The blonde did not look at all disgusted, he swallowed what he could, pulling out the keyboard player's penis, still managing to shoot a small stream on his seductive lips.

How could he have made him finish and still arouse him in such a way?

"You're good?" Wilder asked between spasms

"Perfect ..." he whispered licking the rest of his lips and then continued running his lips along the sides of Alan's phallus.

What was he trying to do? Where Martin was trying to take him?


	7. Like you

Martin got up from the ground shaking a little, Alan helped him by taking one of his hands. 

"You're good?" He asked as he took it from his face to look at him. Gore smiled delighted at the keyboardist's concern. 

"I already told you I'm fine. Why don't you believe me?" 

"Because you swallowed most of it. I have a horrible feeling that you will feel bad later" Wilder whispered, caressing the blonde's face with his fingers slowly. 

"I have already played sick other times" the minor countered, wondering at the affectionate show

"Yes but the causes were not a blowjob"

Mart laughed slowly, releasing himself from Wilder's grip.

"I told you that I loved it. It's the only way I can find to show you that you are actually a little in charge of everything in here" the blonde explained washing his face in the sink.

"You don't need to give me oral sex to make me understand that I am a little in charge of everything"

Alan sighed tucking his penis into his underwear again.

"I wanted you to know that I still think of you" the blonde indicated with his index finger the compartment of the towels to which Alan understood perfectly

"I think about you a lot but I don't want to beat your cake all the time"

Martin couldn't help but really laugh at a high volume

"Where do you get your metaphors from, Al?"

"That is not important now, what I mean is ... that I would like you to take care of yourself a little more. I don't want to see you sick or sad and not tired either"

"Oh my guardian angel, go take a bath now and I'll do the same. I sent Fletch a while ago to apologize to Dave, the strange thing is that it's all very quiet in here, don't you think?" Gore commented taking off the shirt he was wearing

"They're probably playing the red hood and the wolf" Alan laughed, tightening his belt.

"Well, before Fletch eats him alive you should stop him, go" the minor said goodbye, lowering his pants

"Ok, I'll listen to you but don't ignore my advice, okay?"

Martin nodded with an enlightened grin. Alan did not want to leave but he must even if his wishes forbade it.

The chesnut sighed deeply before unlocking the door.  
His heart was pounding uncontrollably as with each step he was away from him.  
/////

Alan left his room with a towel still in his hands. What Mart had said was true, they had been having fun the entire time and neither of them had made a sound.

"Dave?" He asked knocking on the singer's door but got no answer. He dared to open it more to his surprise Gahan was not present. 

He went to Andy's room and the red-haired wasn't inside either.

A characteristic laugh sounded from the kitchen so Alan thought Dave would be with one of his friends.

On the way to the kitchen his ideas were mixed, the apparent but short attention of Mart had returned. Did it mean that they would go back to the little adventures they once had? Was it just a momentary passion?

With Martin you could never be sure of anything.

The chesnut wrapped the towel around one of his arms as he stood at the entrance to the kitchen.  
Dave sounded happy, Andy encouraged his inexplicable laugh with some of his jokes. Wilder dared not interrupt the momentary truce between the two.

He smiled pleased with the result. Apparently there was a fine line of peace for a few moments and Wilder was quietly dedicated to treasuring them.

It wasn't until a scented breeze distracted him that he bent his head, it was the blond who came out of his room looking magnificent, his scent ... Good heavens, was it a trick of the wind stream or did he really perfume the whole place? An intoxicating sweet mist that Alan inhaled revealing a calm smile.

"Why so much laughter?" The blonde asked, fastening a bracelet to his wrist

The keyboardist didn't say a word, he only pointed the way to the kitchen.  
Gore pursed his lips into a corner, standing next to the Londoner.

Dave and Andy were playing with what looked like candy wrapped in small, brightly colored paper.

"Look at the lovebirds feeding on their beaks" mocked the songwriter entering the kitchen

"Queen Mary is finally coming out of her beauty bath," Dave refuted, unwrapping a candy to take between his lips

"What are you guys doing?" The keyboardist questioned sitting next to Fletch

"Getting fat" laughed the ginger guy

"Oh Andy dear, don't say that in front of Mart, it's a bad word for his body" Dave joked reading the bottom side of the chocolate

"What is this all about?" Wilder took a box wrapped in fine wrapping paper

"Well, apparently the television studio that we promised an interview to really wants to have us there so they bribe us with sweets, there's a box for you and for Mart too"

"Actually since a long time ago I wanted to eat something sweet but I never stop to buy when I go out" said Martin taking the box in his hands

"So ... uh ... have you reconciled?" Alan hesitated opening his box equally

"Yup, in addition to the box of chocolates he brought a bouquet of roses, did you, Andy?"  
The black-haired man avoided laughing seeing how the keyboardist took the roses he had left under the table

"The studio is quite in love with Dave" replied Andy reading the inscription

"Why doesn't that surprise me?" Mart sighed unwrapping one of the candies

"When I saw the beautiful red roses I decided to forgive him, I mean who could resist?" Joked the singer

"Well at least for now, maybe we'll discuss later" Andy said almost like a promise.

"We have to take note of that, when will it be? Next week?" With a chuckle, Gore inquired.

"If possible, keep that peace treaty for at least two days" Alan looked at both of them but neither of them looked sure.

"I'll do what I can but you already know Davey, always in trouble" Fletch observed the wrapper in detail "Almond, take" the redhead opened the chocolate, handing it to the singer

"Thanks, I have one for you but you have to kiss me" exclaimed the black-haired man with a loud laugh.

"A kiss?" The keyboardist hesitated to which Gore covered his mouth with a hand to avoid showing his evil smile

"Give me a kiss and I'll give it to you" he commanded placing his cheek in position

Andy sighed defeated barely caressing the younger's cheek to which he smiled

"Apparently this time Dave won" said Alan, watching the blonde and how he took a chocolate in his mouth who nodded raising both eyebrows

"Banana?" Andy laughed reading the candy wrapped in yellow paper

It was the simple things, and at the same time, infinitely complicated that united them in a strange combination.


	8. Told you

Alan searched for Andy and Dave around the place until he found them. Louise was also with them in the bathroom. Fletch's glasses had been removed and Gahan's friend was helping him to get clean

"Everthing good here?" He asked watching the three

"I still can't see anything" explained the redhead

"Don't worry, we'll get this out of you without a hitch."

"Actually I think you should continue with Martin and then do it with Dave. Leave Fletch to me, I can do it"

"Okay, I'm very sorry about what happened to you Andy" the woman apologized

"I don't" laughed Dave leaving

"You will pay me" whispered Andy

"Sit on the toilet, I can't do it like that" Alan explained taking a previously wet towel

"Everything okay between you and Martin?" Fletch questioned with his closed eyes 

"What? Is so obvious?" The older one inquired, cleaning the youngest nose

"Your suffering expression for him? Well yes. One piece of advice, don't be fooled by his beauty, he isn't the innocent creature he proves to be"

"I can't help it ... I feel strange with I'm close to him"

"Don't tell me you fell in love" laughed the youngest with a laugh of his own

"You too? No, of course not!"

"Well no, please don't complicate our bad reputation. We have enough with the press on our asses."

"It's not all my fault, you stop touching Dave's butt" they both laughed in a confident smile

"You know me, I like to play on the ledge. Also, have you seen the circumference of that thing? It's magical" the redhead mocked feeling the cold cloth of the towel on his face

"Whether Dave is sexy or not is not an excuse enough. Let's put bad habits aside."

"I don't think I can resist his sexy butt. It's so soft" Andy whispered in a wicked grin.

"Really? If it's that so, I wouldn't mind" the singer answered suddenly through the door.

"Damn it, Alan" complained the keyboardist to which Wilder finished cleaning it

"Allie honey, you can go get ready"

"No way! I'm not done with Andy yet"

"Well, whatever you want. And you ..." whispered the singer looking at Fletch "You can touch me whenever you want" with a sensual air the black-haired man left with a slow step

"My god ..." laughed the red-haired looking at his glasses shaking his head

"How do you go about ... you know ... resist?" Asked the older fearful sitting on the toilet before taken

Fletch smiled opening the water tap

"Dave? Well I don't actually like boys, it's just a game. 'Let's hold Gahan's vanity high' makes him feel desired by the entire world, brings us a little closer and makes strained relationships take a toll. Relaxed course, you know. It dosen't mean there isn't limits but that's okay "

"Honestly, I couldn't stand it, I was never good at games and even less when it comes to mind games"

"Each one treasures his gift, I suppose yours is not temperance"

"I guess" the keyboardist whispered sadly

"Hey guys, who helps Louise?" Mart smiled standing next to the bathroom door

"I won't, I had your face for twelve minutes, I can't feel my arm anymore" Alan complained, bending his shoulder

"Lazy. Go then Fletch" Alan had not realized until then the power of Martin, he would never have imagined him as a tyrant despot but now he fulfilled the role wonderfully. The red-haired sighed sadly accepting his fate, walking to the dressing room again 

"See you in paradise" exaggerated the keyboardist with an amused grin. Silence reigned between them, Alan didn't know if words would be enough for Martin. For a few seconds all he felt was fear. 

"Hello", the blond innocent greeted

"Hello" Alan replied with a shy laugh

"Something's wrong?" Inquired the youngest 

"I'm scared of you sometimes you know?" Finally he let out with a blushing face 

"Scare?" Gore questioned approaching "You shouldn't, I won't hurt you" he replied taking a lock of Alan between his fingers 

"I don't know how to react to you" for some reason he had to fix his gaze on the blonde who had the expression of an angel. That's what he was, a dark angel lost in his sins 

Gore finally lowered his face a little after barely kissing the corner of his mouth "You think too much, you must feel with me" clarified the composer, making the oldest trembling between his lips   
/////

On the bus Dave looked like an excited kid, turning around with a shocked expression

"Dave sit down," Wilder ordered with his hand over his eyes, despite not seeing him he could hear him, his quick steps.

"I can't, I feel ... You know, weird"

"You feel good?" Andy whispered in Mart's ear but the blonde only gave a little moan

"What's wrong, Mart?" Inquired the chestnut

"I'm fine, both of you stop bothering me" mentioned the blonde standing up

"Must be the candies. Is not fever." Dave placed a hand on Gore's forehead.

Alan clicked his tongue against his palate at the memory of the afternoon. No doubt he would feel bad and he knew it by heart.

"Do you want me to stop the bus?" Wilder straightened

"Yes ... Maybe, yes"

"You really gonna be sick minutes before the concert?" With some anger asked Gahan

Alan hit the dividing glass causing the driver to stop on the side of the road

"Do you want me to go with you?" Wilder placed a hand on his shoulder

Mart simply and with a hand on his belly got off the bus running out the door

Andy tried to follow him but Wilder stopped him

"I'll go, stay here" he murmured in a kind air

"Hold his hair or he will feel worse," Fletch explained in dismay.

The keyboardist looked around, it was easy to spot Martin in the bushes.  
He stood behind him holding his shoulder with one hand and the composer's hair with the other.

"I told you but you never listen to me" sighed Alan gently caressing the blonde's back


	9. Strange

After everything that happened, Martin slipped into his room where he locked himself up.  
Andy knew that tonight he would not see his friend again, at least not until the next morning.  
Dave tried knocking on the door a few times but to no avail.  
Alan ... knew that nothing he did would make him feel better.

In fact it was his fault. Their obscene play brought them more trouble than pleasure. He regretted from the bottom of his soul that he had accepted the request. If he had not done so, nothing would have happened or so Wilder believed for a moment.

Pacing around in his room the keyboardist thought he would go crazy. His nervous pulse ordered to go out and break down the door but his reasoning forbade it.

His fluttering heart magnetically propelled him to Gore's closed door. He refused, wrung his hands, complained deep in his throat.  
The only positive thing that could have happened that night was the short span of time.

Alan threw himself uselessly on his bed where his head was spinning with maniacal ideas. Why was this weakness suddenly attacking him insistently? What was the motivation behind Martin's delicious malice?

What did the blonde gain by provoking him? Using him? Forcing him to see how he fulfilled his dark whims? A strange force made him to feel mortally in need of Gore's sweet skin.

Alan felt bad about himself. He had literally ruined a concert night. Nerd. It wasn't all his fault; remembering Gore's request he realized that mania was haunting him with fanatical thoughts.

He could jump out of the window and feel nothing about it, yet he wanted to see Mart and apologize in any way necessary.

"Bollocks" he whispered, getting up suddenly to take the doorknob but ... when he opened it the door sounded with a soft, almost soundless knock.

Wilder felt his skin contract in a sudden chill. It was instinctive to open it carefully, stealthily.  
Martin, who had apparently taken a shower, waited peacefully on the other side with his arms crossed.

"Mart?" The keyboard player asked with some regret when he saw him almost impeccable

"Let me in" the younger ordered stiffly without any tremor in his voice.

Alan swallowed a large lump in his throat, opening the door wide, seeing how the blond passed through the room.

"I'm sorry ... if I hadn't ... you know"

"I didn't came to listen to you, I came to get what I want"

What did he want? Did he want something from him after what happened? Wilder did not understand and even took a few seconds to close the door

"Tell me what you want" the older commented in a low voice.

"I want you to fuck me, really this time"

"Are you kidding me? I won't touch you again" said the terrified musician.

"I gave you the blowjob because I wanted to. Nobody made me"

"Anyway ... I feel bad for listening to you"

"Have you ever wondered that what happens around you is not controlled by you but by destiny? You will see, we are puppets in this paper world" commented Martin taking a bottle from his back pocket

"What is that?" The chestnut asked with a bad feeling

"Close the door with the key", the blonde forced, taking off the black shirt that fitted him.

"And now that?" The keyboardist grumbled, watching him get rid of his pants

"Shut up for once and listen to me"

Alan was really confused.  
Nothing that happened made any sense. Mart had no sense of his own. He closed the door with key while the blonde took him by the collar of the shirt he was wearing to throw him on the mattress

"You're going to break me a bone if you continue, stop" Wilder asked between gasps to which the youngest refused with just a gesture

The blonde hurriedly unbuttoned each button, shirt and pants almost pulling the fabric, Wilder swore he heard the seams coming loose.

"Take it off", the composer commanded, poking at Alan's abdomen.

Almost as if by magic, he took it off himself with a sudden desire not to make him angry.

The songwriter gasped furiously as he found Alan's flaccid member in his underwear.

"Martin, wait ... wait" begged Alan, looking into his eyes to which the blonde looked askance at him, working the keyboardist's penis in a hurry in search of an erection

"I want you to make me shake on your legs. Make me scream your name" at this point Alan had no idea if it was an order or a game "I want you to come with me and I want it rude. Hurt me if necessary but give me a glorious ecstasy "he moaned taking the bottle before sighted opening the lid while the liquid looked thick inside

"What do you want now?" Purr the keyboardist half excited

"Take off your shoes and underwear" commanded the blond dipping a finger into the crystalline bottle to take it inside him

His member jumped when he saw the younger man stimulating himself. Within seconds neither of them was wearing clothes

Alan waited a few eternal moments while Gore dilated pleasantly, biting his lower lip.

"The fun is for two" Wilder stopped him laughing

With a lustful, half-calm gesture he poured the rest of the liquid down Alan's member. Wilder groaned at the cool, thick texture running down his phallus. A painful sensation that drove him to physical need.

Alan smiled taking the blond's hips tightly

"Ride it" dictated the chestnut giving him a spanking to which Gore sighed anxiously

Martin liked to walk the fine line of pleasure and pain, maybe Alan could give him what he longed for.


	10. Body

Martin barely touched the chestnut's penis with his fingers. Alan reached for the blond's hips furiously to lower him carefully onto his member.  
The blonde knew the daily routine when it came to the keyboard player but sometimes he forgot about reality.

In a heartrending moan, Martin let himself be penetrated, getting what he wanted, pain in the form of pleasure.  
Alan gasped feeling the warm interior of the blonde who was barely moving with an obvious wince of pain

"Do you want me to take it out?" He whispered watching the composer slowly squirm

"No, no. Turn me around," Gore ordered with a certain tremor in his voice, closing his eyes in response to the sudden movement.

Alan tried to put aside the rational side, the side that drove him daily to be correct. In a slow sway Wilder turned him around, still surprised to hear him moan

"Apparently ... you had already forgotten about this" gasped the musician giving a gentle thrust to which the green-eyed man sighed, pressing the sheets with both hands

"Break me" begged in a machiavellian tone the one with curls feeling the soft rhythm of Wilder

"I won't stop and you know it" he sighed in the other's ear as he took the writer's delicate neck in his hand

"I know" he sighed between a short sob and another 

Alan felt that wet skin swaying in an agitated rhythm, desperately searching for the point of pleasure.  
Martin slowly forgot the spasm to let himself be carried away by Wilder's hips

The keyboardist smiled with pleasure as he scandalously bite the blonde's back, who gave a chuckle

The keyboardist enjoyed the position but desire invaded him. He stopped taking Martin's hips to turn him up again

"What?" The songwriter asked puzzled as he looked into Alan's blue eyes.

"I want to see you" he murmured caressing his waist to which the blonde blushed watching him for an erratic time

Gore took his own member working it while Alan kept time with the beat.

How far could they go without caring about the consequences?

"Charlie" sighed in a sudden start the youngest as the sound of their bodies colliding invaded the room alternated with some heavy moans from Martin.

Alan preferred to bite his lips to the point of feeling them bleed, the sweat on the composer's forehead increased.  
The beads of sweat trickling down Martin's body simply looked like dewdrops.

The blonde tugged at his curls every time Wilder's pace became erratic seeking his center. It wasn't until Gore literally screamed that the keyboardist found the place he needed to work hard.

In his mind it was never about his own pleasure, it was about Martin's smile, his body shivering with lust  
; of his legs losing strength. Of his wet lips, of his bright eyes, of everything that made him feel whole.

Mart had lost track of Alan's expression, he couldn't see the chestnut's concern as he desperately searched for a show of affection.

Not a caress, not a kiss. Gore was frivolous when it came to having to show his insides, or at least it was so with him.

Maybe it was because Martin never felt anything for him. His heart despaired in an erratic pounding as the blond leaned even closer.

"Raise your knees" Gore commanded, sticking his belly to Alan's belly, only divided by the guitarist's member.

Wilder sighed without air raising both legs until he had Mart a little above him with his index finger traveling curiously along the line of his lips.

"Do it ... Finish it up" he screeched feeling how the blue-eyed man treated him the way he liked.

Alan was a slave, he could know it now since he had not opposed anything, not even one of the words that had come from the tyrants lips. Lips that drove him crazy, lips he wanted to reach in a non-physical way. Would he ever deserve that mouth?

Wilder put his gentle character aside when he grabbed him by the hips and give him thrusts that in his conscience he had never given in previous encounters.

Gore obviously enjoyed those uninterrupted shaking more than the entire act itself and Alan knew it when his fiery whimpers filled the room as he came on his chest quickly.

Unlike Martin, Alan, preferred to wait by removing his member in one go. The blond rolled to his side breathing through his mouth touching his entire body still ecstatic from the sudden orgasm.

The keyboardist continued to masturbate, only observing the ceiling listening to Martin's muffled voice in his ear.

"Wait ... let me ... do it" the blonde spoke tenderly taking the keyboard player's penis between his fine fingers giving him some infernal caresses, Mart knew the male anatomy perfectly so it was not difficult for him to provoke some delightful sobs in Alan

"Charlie ... look at me" ordered the younger one.  
Wilder denied within himself doing so, when he turned around he could see the blond with his lips parted, his eyes ... Good heavens, his eyes were beautiful and they were watching him stubbornly.  
A few more squeezes made Wilder come on Gore's closed hand.

As his belly settled down, Mart was still holding his throbbing phallus.

"Shit" sighed in a choked laugh the Londoner

The youngest lay down on his chest.

"What? Did you get tired?" He smiled between sighs as sweat trickled down his neck, his lips red as well as his cheeks. Green eyes blazing like emeralds gave him an inexplicable sensation. His hair still tousled gave him an irresistible air.

"I love you" the keyboardist murmured in a painful phrase

Martin opened his lips a little more with his half-open eyes "I love you too" murmured the blonde stroking the wet face of the musician

Wilder was falling apart but the warm kisses from the blonde hid the despair on his face.


	11. Crazy

Martin had quickly reached the dream leaving Alan alone with his thought.

The musician snorted with his gaze fixed on the ceiling, the lamp didn't illuminate the room completely, only enough to avoid stumbling. In fact, Wilder believed that the small electric bulb was not enough to illuminate the blond's precious body, to recreate his curves or to illustrate the singular glow of his skin.

He dared to smile to himself while with his mouth he delicately nibbled the neck of the youngest who woke up with a happy laugh, Gore even caressed the keyboard player's back with his hand

"What are you doing?" The blonde questioned looking into his eyes with a solace gesture

"I taste you ... You're so sweet" Wilder commented seriously taking a sip of the skin on Gore's chest

"Don't eat me" laughed the blonde feeling Alan's warm tongue travel the way to his cervix

"I can't promise anything, after all you are my candy"

"Yeah? What else am I?" Inquired the youngest with a smile of his own

"You are my doll. My paradise on earth"

"Oh God, I'm already hot again" teased the blonde caressing his own body

"You are sun and sand, you are sea and rain" sighed Alan descending to the blonde's abdomen with slow kisses

"Al ... don't come down" the youngest asked in a whisper

"Okay, I won't force you to do anything you don't want to"

"Take me by the waist, snuggle with me. It's cold" he smiled turning his back to the keyboardist who held him gently against his body "Also ... if you wanna it later ..." suggested the blonde in a lascivious gesture 

"I couldn't ... if I make love to you I want you to look into my eyes, I want you to hear my voice as I penetrate you"

"Hush Alan, you will make me hard again"

"You are my naughty boy, Marty" the musician remarked in the other's ear clinging to his hips  
/////

The first thing Alan heard the next morning was the violent knocking of the door

"Martin it's time for you to wake up, we should go" Andy snorted in a serious tone from the other side "Mart?" He called again with no answer

Alan opened his eyes breathing deeply as he felt the contact of Martin's warm skin  
He raised his head a little to see the divine expression of the blond who clung to his arm tightly. Still asleep he looked fatally beautiful, the keyboardist could not help but smile in a happy gesture when he saw him so helpless and fresh.  
The chestnut covered his face in small kisses as Gore woke up in a stifled laugh.

"Good morning, my dolly boy" Alan gasped with his mouth inches away from the blonde's skin.

"Good morning to you, daddy" purred the guitarist giving him a kiss on the lips

"Martin, I'm not playing," yelled Fletch from the other side

"Give me an hour, Andy" commented the blonde

"One hour, you have one hour" threatened the red-haired to which Mart laughed

"One hour?" Wilder inquired lowering himself to Gore's chest.

"To bathe us, silly. Not for a quick one" exclaimed Martin biting his lip

"We can do both"

Martin couldn't help but laugh at the proposal

"Very fair, come ... bathe me" the blonde wheezed enjoying Wilder's curious tongue that traveled over his nipples  
/////

Alan didn't know the sensation, an ingrained passion that made him a slave to desire.  
Martin was in charge of brushing his teeth while behind the delicate cloth curtain Alan was excited just remembering last night.

His cock stiffened at his own contact, as his fingers traveled the entire length, he sighed feeling agitated again as he gently touched his glans as the warm water traveled nonstop through his body

A hard gasp escaped his lips, calling out the guitarist's curiosity.

"Al? Everything okay?" Asked behind the shower curtain

"I deal with the effect of your charms" Wilder sighed.

Martin moved the cloth a little, not looking at all surprised.

"Here, put this on the floor" he commanded handing him a towel

"What's it for?"

The blonde did not respond, he took off the underwear he was wearing, going into the shower, wetting his hair with the warm water that ran from the shower

"Do I have to explain everything to you?" He smiled stroking Wilder's shoulders in a slow sigh as he approached the keyboardist.

Wilder shivered when he saw him close, the warm sensation of the shower mixing with the senses.

Mart approached him almost joining their mouths.  
Wilder tossed the towel on the floor waiting for the next order.

"What's this magic?" hesitated the chestnut caressing the blond's face

"I like to call it passion but you can say whatever you want"

Alan sat on the towel waiting for the blonde who in a simple smile descended onto his lap

"Just like that?"

"Fuck me, fuck me hard" despaired the youngest in a uniform shaking hips

The Londoner grabbed Gore's drawn waist, pulling him up to his erection.

"Charlie!" The songwriter screamed as he felt his cock slipping into him

"Who is my good boy?" The blue-eyed man asked jokingly, penetrating him

"I'll be your good boy, nail it to me, please? I wanna ride your cock"

Alan felt like he would come immediately upon seeing Martin's expression as he said his obscenities

"Daddy will make you see the stars, baby" growled the keyboard player, pulling his penis back in and out in a sudden movement

"Yes! Yes! Daddy know the things his naughty boy likes it" laughed hysterically the green-eyed man jumping subtly on Wilder's lap


	12. Out

Even Alan tried he couldn't stop thinking as Martin moaned and briskly dropped into the chestnut's masculinity

Again the questions invaded his mind as if it were an eternal enigma.  
The blond was swaying with his eyes closed in a medium pace not rushing the situation against Wilder's chest.

The scene itself seemed sensual to the blue-eyed: The guitarist letting himself be carried away by his pleasure center while the warm water from the shower fell on his body, on his face, on his skin.

This was the real Martin, this was the real Gore. A man who simply allowed his emotions to flow, then analyzed them and let them go.  
No makeup, no provocative outfits, no forced smile. Just his beautiful complexion and wild instincts. His beautiful face gesturing the typical expressions of joy.

Alan felt the warm touch of pleasure but still resisted letting some kind of sound escape.  
He wanted to pay full attention to the gestures, to the details, to everything true that Gore could express

"I have to do the work alone?" The blond laughed caressing both shoulders of the musician

"Sorry ..." the chestnut murmured kissing the blond's neck to climb up to his face

Wilder gasped, moving his hips deeply causing a little cry on the blond.  
The songwriter smiled at the feel of Alan's fingers tracing his waist.

Mart believed that Wilder was a shy shadow, a specter with an addiction to loneliness and that is why he liked him.  
Martin felt shy when he met him, when he took his hand for the first time his skin contracted just as it did now.  
From a talented young man to an attractive man. Strong character, exact words.

Alan sighed carrying a continuous friction.  
Martin finally met his eyes as he smiled lustfully.

"You are mine. Only mine, did you hear me?" Spoke in a severe tone the chestnut giving him a spanking

"Only yours" vibrated the blond against his thighs feeling Wilder's hand caressing his neck to lower down to his belly

"You belong to me ... only me" moaned the older one, taking the faster pace

Martin thought it was unnecessary to answer him, he only limited himself to clinging his body with a tender grip, Alan was aware somehow this hurt him sentimentally, at the moment it was pleasure, later ... it would be an inexplicable emptiness.

Wilder believed that the world was turning by effort, by hard work.  
Now he considered it turned only on the lips of who sighed gladly at his special attentions.

"Do you want me to make you finish now?" Asked the keyboard player losing his breath

"And what about you?" The blond hesitated confused

"It doesn't matter now, I don't want my baby to miss out on his prize" he smiled biting the guitarist's lips

"Alright ..." he sighed feeling as Wilder slowly pulled his member out.

Alan stood up from the floor helping him to do to the same, take him back against the bathroom wall

Years ago Gore would have complained about not making him enjoy in every way possible but now he understood the reason for every action, at least intimate, that Alan took.

The chestnut was quick, taking an aggressive rhythm, Martin enjoyed deep inside. A few static seconds that were pure ecstasy for both of them.

Gore came sooner with a little help of his hand and finally Alan groaned, holding onto the blond's hips hard as he finished while he was pushing him with his body.  
/////

After their little act they finally took a real shower.

Alan had dressed and watched the youngest put on his underwear, looking himself at the mirror.

The red marks of his fingers were obvious on the blond's lower waist.

"Oh Mart. I'm so sorry" the blue-eyed lamented approaching to him

"Why? This? It doesn't even hurt" the blond shrugged him off taking his shirt but stopped when he saw Alan kneel in front of him "What are you doing?"

Wilder observed each mark, going over it with his fingers and then kissing them carefully "I'm sorry", he begged between sighs, feeling Gore's hand caress his damp hair.

"Allie ... don't do it. You know how much I like it when you touch me."

Alan reviewed with his lips each mark and also the belly, his abdomen, his hips feeling the silky skin of Martin in his mouth.

"You're perfect" he gasped giving a soft suck to the guitarist's waist, who was breathing agitated when he felt the keyboardist's warm lips.

"Martin, it's ten minutes until your time is up. If you're not ready then we're leaving. And so without you Alan, stop playing the little house" Andy snapped annoyed from the other side of the door

"Get into your own business, Andy. Why you come here and interrupt my moment with my dolly boy?" Alan laughed. Martin laughed too freeing himself to grab his pants

"Well, stop giving him so much pampering. Finish it up" Dave replied in the same way

"Why don't the two of you go to -...?" Alan commented standing up

"To have a coffee, yes. We will catch you up later" Martin covered the musician's mouth with his hand

"No thanks, we are not interested in looking at each other and professing love like you" scoffed Andy

"Hey, not even a kiss?" Grumbled Dave

"Shut up," Fletch muttered.

"Resolve the dramas with your pussycat, ginger, leave my Mart alone" the chestnut laughed again feeling how Gore gave him a kiss on the cheek before putting on his shirt

"You're crazy" smiled the blond before giving him a short kiss on the lips


	13. WRITER'S INFORMATION

I'd had the worst experience of my life by surviving to a twister. I'm sorry if I didn't wrote anything. I promise I will. Writer out.


	14. Love is...

Martin was gorgeous, Alan knew it when he saw him getting ready in front of the mirror.

"You are beautiful" he sighed with a racing heart

Martin smiled combing his curls, the chestnut sounded eager and sincere at the same time.

"I'd tell you to stop but it's useless. Besides, I like you to flatter me"

"I can't, God knows I tried but I can't stop thinking about you, I have you on my mind all day" sighed the keyboardist again to approach the songwriter  
Martin couldn't help but blush when he saw him approach, he turned around to watch him with his green eyes.

Wilder trembled as the blond lunged for his mouth with an eager kiss

"Easy, honey, we have to go" he remembered hearing Gore stir, pulling a bit of his hair

"I wish we had a little more time" gasped the blond running his hands over Alan's shoulders

"My wild lily" murmured Alan as he gave him a kiss and another

"If you tell me names we won't leave the room" Gore giggled, running his nose down the musician's face. "Tiger" smiled in a sensual way

"Oh, I want to do it again" Wilder laughed against the skin of the green-eyed neck.

"We should go, babe. Remember Andy and Dave must be fighting again."

"Leave them, you and I must live our lives" Alan knew that Martin would want to be in the middle of both but he was already fed up

"I don't want the fights to drag on, I wish everything was as before" the sadness in his voice somehow hurt Alan

"Fights don't last forever, one day one of them will have to give up" Alan softly released him from his arms.

"I hope or this will be impossible. How do I look?" The younger hesitated pulling his light curls between his fingers

"Dashing" the chestnut whispered in the ear of the other listening to the laugh of the guitarist

Hearing him laugh had become an immaculate need. He had to know, he needed to know that Martin was happy and that he was the cause of the momentary joy.

"Baby?" The blond asked suddenly with a unique tenderness

"Tell me" Alan answered without noticing the kiss that Gore had stolen from him.

"Let's go" Martin dragged him with his hand to the door

With a less gentle face Andy waited on the other side.

"You two think this is a game? The whole damn hotel complained about your screaming last night. It's not my business what the two of you do in the room but you can't expose us like that. Behave yourself" the redhead commanded clutching a jacket that carried in his arms

"Calm down Fletch, you act like Martin's mother, he's just your friend" Alan complained putting his hands in his pockets 

"I was expecting a bit of maturity on your part but it's in vain" snorted the ginger guy shaking his head 

"Enough both of you, I already said that we won't achieve anything by arguing with each other" Martin pushed them away a bit with his hands "Where's Dave?" The blond looked around but there was no sign of him 

"He left with Daniel, he didn't want to wait for you anymore" with a gesture of discomfort Fletch took the hall to the elevator lifting his suitcase 

"And our things?" Yelled Wilder 

"I had prepared Martin's suitcases since yesterday, Dan send for picking your belongings" 

"I withdraw what I said, it's your mother" Alan sighed making Mart chuckle   
///// 

The air felt rough without Dave in the car. Somehow the singer was a bell that rang to the beat of laughter or jokes. Alan tried very hard not to observe Fletch during the journey as it caused him headaches to argue with him, and Martin had also asked him to. The only thing Wilder regretted was the lack of privacy they could have from one moment to the next. Being a recognized band not only the fans chased them. 

It was about the production, the shows, the writing of the new songs. Everything mixed in a forceful knot inside Alan's head. Observing the surrounding environment at the window became a habit that turned into a boring pastime

The air coming in through the window was not enough to distract him. The sounds mixing into a single auditory mass confused him slightly. Nothing was enough to stun him of his thoughts. Nothing could make him leave his frivolous shadow.  
In a way the uniqueness of the world was less and less. The keyboardist hated the feeling he gave himself every time he remembered it.  
Sometimes he felt that he was not important to anyone at all. He thought it would be the same feeling as a lost child.

It wasn't until Martin laid down for him that life suddenly changed. Alan watched, surprised but still polite, the way he smiled on his shoulder. How was it possible that he was never aware that the sun was shining until it hit Martin's face? He was able to feel him warm his skin only when Gore placed his head on his shoulder with a smile that could light up an entire room.

Was that love? Why did it feel so good? Why Martin? Alan had many doubts but only one answer: The special warmth, that unequaled brightness, his little sun was Martin, in a strange way he illuminated it. It warmed his heart and kept him safe from the horrendous darkness.

He listened to Fletch snort in discontent, he didn't care. He smiled lacing one of his hands to the blond's.

Love ... a feeling that had rarely come into his life now took a beautiful form in the guitarist's displays of affection. If that was love then the world would make sense again.

It was the sweetest and gentlest thing he had ever felt inside him.


End file.
